Change that Channel

Today was the latest installment of painful interactions with my parents. At first I got caught up in the tragedy of the situation. It made me feel sad, helpless and confused. I even spread the pain around telling the story a couple of places. I recieved solid advice but continued in my feeling bad.

Something shifted. I realized that my parents present circumstance is a direct outcome of decisions they had made in all the many years and are now making. Sometimes it seems that they are competing to get the most attention or create the biggest drama. So I started to ask God to bless them in the journey they have chosen.

As I took a little distance I realized that I, without paying attention, had fallen into the space of feeling like I'm not being a good and loving daughter if I did not share in their drama and pain. I have no patience for drama queens or self pity parties. What role was I auditioning for here and how would it help either of them or me? Not only that but I was also spreading the misery around. Ouch!

I'm changing the channel now. I'm going upstairs and pulling out the photos I have of my parents and my childhood and recalling some of our good times together. Thank you you Dad for the love you showed me and the lessons I learned through the years. I now return to you the best I have to offer which is my gratitude and love. May these good vibes ease your suffering. I love you.